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DOGGIE STORIES

10/11/2019

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Picture
CORNEY BROOK
Have you heard the story about this canine fella who liked to crap in the house while her owner was away? You haven’t? 

What would happen is the owner would arrive home, open her front door and there would be her dog, her tail wagging to beat the proverbial band. On the middle of the owner’s living room floor would be a pile of not particularly well-defined dumped doggie doo doo.


Picture
BUSTER ENJOYING FIRE
The first time this happened, the owner let out a blast of shouts and reprimands, grabbed the mid-sized dog by the neck, dragged her across the floor, stuffed her nose into the crappy mess and then tossed the poor dog out the living room window.

​Didn’t seem to matter how often the owner blasphemed, jammed the dog’s nozzle into the poop and tossed her out the window. Because the next day and the next day the same mess was waiting for the owner.

Always the same dog discipling approach. The said owner would open the door, see the pile of dog crap, would loudly reprimand, grab the dog, stick the dog’s nose into the crap and then toss the stubborn doggie out the window.


Picture
CAT GANG
However, things changed one day. The owner came home, opened the door and was, as usual, met by her happy dog and the pile of brown crap on the floor.

​This particular day, however, the dog took control of the disciplining technique. She ran up to the owner, tail wagging like crazy, then ran to the doo doo, jammed her nose into the pile and then, to her owner’s surprise, leapt out the window, all by her little lonesome.

My question is, what had the dog learned by being shouted at, having his nose jammed into his mess and then being tossed out the window? 


Picture
LAKE O"LAW'S COLOURS
Here’s another story. Name has been changed to protect the dog.

Years ago, I got a phone call at work. A partner of mine had had a canine incident which upset her. You see, what happened, was while I was at work, my partner had heard a knock on the door.


​When she opened the door, who should be standing there, but a man. He was a nice fella, I can vouch for that. There he was, standing in the doorway, holding a beautiful bouquet of flowers.


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SEAGULL ON LUNCH BREAK
My partner invited him in. Now remember, this was all happening while I was innocently working at my place of employment.

​The nice man, who lived in our apartment building, stepped in and handed the flowers to my partner.


Picture
FALL BERRIES
During this kind and loving transaction, our dog was standing next to my partner. She was growling. Fido was not very welcoming.

My partner, trying to get my dog to nice it up a touch or two, said to our dog, Fido, “It’s okay, Fido. It’s okay.”


Fido, using, I believe, the same sort of canine reasoning as the dog in the previous story, thought, “I guess it’s okay if I’m told it’s okay.” So, he bit the nice man. I’m assuming because he was told it was okay.


So, I got this phone call from my troubled partner.


I said, “Let me get this straight. A man came to our apartment. He came to give you some flowers and Fido bit him. Did I get this right?”


“Yes,” she replied.


“So what’s the problem?” I asked.


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SUE AND BUSTER AT QUEBEC PICNIC PARK
There’s a little more to this story. I felt sorry for the man, who himself owned two dogs. He owned a very large dog and a very small dog.

​I took the elevator up to the eighth floor and knocked on the nice man’s door. I wanted to apologize. He opened the door. His two dogs poured out. They were all over me. They were so happy to see me and made a big fuss over me as if I was the King of Spain.

​I apologized extra profusely because his dogs treated me with such respect, dignity and love. 


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HIKERS ENJOYING THE VIEW IN CAPE BRETON
A few nights ago, we were sitting in the living room watching a CNN reality television show.

​Suddenly, we heard a thunk, thunk. We also heard a rattle, rattle. I looked up and there was Buster. He had banged his water dish with his nose and then to make his point extra clear, he’d begun to bang his nose against our big drinking water bottle.


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BUSTER AT HIS HUMANS' BEHAVIOUR STUDY TABLE
It was pretty obvious what Buster wanted. I got up and sure enough his water dish was empty. So, I poured water into it and Buster drank the water. See Buster drink. Drink Buster, drink. Sorry. I started thinking I was writing a Dick and Jane blog.

​After Buster had his fill, he jumped up on the couch and sat beside me.

Oh, but Buster was getting rather aggressive with his paw. See Buster get aggressive. Look, Sue, look.


​Sorry. Grade one flashbacks.


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SEAL FISHING
Anyway, Buster began to poke his paw against my shirt’s top pocket. Bang, bang and what is he up to now?

What he was up to was he was explaining to me, by using forceful pointing that he wanted a piece of gum which was in my top pocket.


​I didn’t give him any because he can’t chew gum, but only licks off the gum’s yummy sweet taste and then leaves the denuded piece of gum on the floor.


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HIKER ENJOYING CORNEY BROOK TRAIL
And, like the other two dogs, Buster had thought things out and realized, in his case, that forceful pointing gets results.

See Buster nose or paw tap Sue’s walking boots. Oh look. See Buster nose or paw tap the treat bottle, the blue leash, the food dish, the coat, the truck keys, his tea cup, Olvatine cup, Sue’s bowl of ice cream, my steak, the front door, the toilet bowl. Go Buster go.


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FALL COLOURS ON OUR ROAD
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